Freshmen Dorms

She sat down in front of him, tilting her head. "Like....phobia-freak-you-out? Or just a disgust?"

If there was one thing Jake rarely was, was scared. He enjoyed doing things that scared the hell out of most normal people.

But he had one fear and that was centipedes.

"I uh...more of a phobia. They just really freak me out. I mean I got bit, and my worst nightmare would be to like you know in those horror films where like swarms of poisonous spiders eat a guy, that would be mine. But with centipedes."Jake fet shivers race through him at that thought.

"Yeah I know Jake is afraid of bugs? You would have never thought that huh?" He laughed weakly.

Evelyn cracked a grin. "The irony is hilarious," she admitted truthfully. She reached over and squeezed his hand. "But you're talking to someone too afraid to look out a plane window so I really can't laugh."

She pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Actually, I can - till the next time I have to board a plane or you piss me off enough to make me climb onto that damn ledge, and then you'd get to laugh back at me."

Jake felt his cheeks warm as the blush crept to them and he buried his face into a pillow to hide it.

"Don't! Seriously I know its stupid. Actually I can't even justify my fear, going splat is a good reason."

"Centipedes can hurt," Evelyn said logically, leaning over and poking his head. "They can cling onto yoru skin, pierce you with a hundred tiny needles, poison you, and you'd have to burn your skin off to get them off or you're stuck with them for life." She paused and ruffled his hair, grinning. "Oh, yeah, not deadly at all."

Jake shuddered picking his head up he felt like his skin was crawling.

"Oh god stop!" Jake said, feeling goosebumps rise on his skin.

He figured this was karma getting him back for making Evelyn climb out on the ledge.

Evelyn tried not to laugh. Phobias weren't funny. But Jake's reactions were!

She stifled another yawn and ruffled his head gain before getting to her feet. "You'll live, tiger. Anyways, I gotta get ho-"

"PIZZA! COME OUT!" Seth's voice hollered.

Thankfully, it was Ashton who knocked on Jake's door. "Pizza, guys. Ignore the background rock concert," he called through the door and then walked back to where Seth had dropped the pizza on the table.

Jake looked to the door then back at Evelyn.

Jake rubbed the back of his neck and flicked his eyes up at her, "You hungry? If you want you can stay and have pizza." Jake offered, mostly so he could spend a little more time with her.

Then again he wasn't sure how the guys would act. But he would understand if she said no.

She sent him an uncertain glance and then swallowed and turned away. "I...I left Nova on Alexis' watch too long," she muttered. unable to meet his eyes because she was a terrible liar.

But if she were honest, she wanted to escape. Get away from him before she just dug herself deeper into this. So she was a coward. She didn't want to deal with whatever she felt for him. So she was going to back off.

Because it was just way too messy to fix.

"Thanks, but, um, I can't," she added weakly, grabbing her bag where it lay on the floor and unlocking Jake's door.

Jake gazed at Evelyn, wondering why she was in such a hurry to leave. Because it was being made pretty obvious she wanted nothing more than to run off.

Jake mused over this for a moment and then he remembered. It was probably--no it was because of what he had said earlier to her, before she passed out.

You love her.

"Wait." Jake got up and stood a few feet from her.

"Its because of what I said earlier, isn't it. When I told you that I, I." He paused and pushed on, "I said that I love you."

Jake's heart skipped a couple of beats, and he drew in a breath to make sure he had still been breathing.

He said it and there was no turning back now.

Evelyn looked away from him and down at her feet, shuffling them uncomfortably. "No," she said shortly. "I just...I just don't see the point of hanging around is all. E-exams and...and stuff," she said quietly.

"You're a terrible liar you know that?" Jake laughed lightly, letting out a long sigh.

"But I really fucked things up didn't I?" He asked her although he knew the answer to that question.

She peeked back up at him beneath her lashes for a second. Guilt gnawed at her stomach. It wasn't like he had actually ruined anything on purpose. This was just her being a wuss.

"No, it's just...." She felt a need to explain. She lifted her chin, meeting his eyes properly. "I don't believe in....in love. I just....it doesn't seem anything more than a made-up commercial thing to me. I believe in genuine like, and platonic love for family and friends, but I can't fathom um...I just don't know what exactly it is that you're calling love. Because so far, nothing we've been putting each other through is fitting that commercial, cheesy vision of love that I've heard about, the so-called magical feeling."

"I, I don't know. Its just I know our relationship is just beyond dysfunctional and I know when you picture love its supposed to be this whole, over the top ordeal. With roses and candles and me showing up on a white horse." Jake realized he was going on a tangent and cleared his throat.

"The thing is even through all the crap we've put each other through these last few months. All the stupid arguements, injuries and Nova." He smiled. Before returning her gaze.

"I know this is crazy and its so weird you know?" He tilted his head. "You would think two people who constantly harass each other all the time, how could they even tolerate each other. Its just I know I like you, a lot. And its just I would never want anything bad to happen to you. Unless you know if it was me bugging you." Jake snorted, running a hand through his hair.

"Plus seeing you with another guy just it drives me nuts, and all the things you do. How you glare at me when I do stupid crap, or the fact you callled me a sausage or whatever. Also its just when I'm around you, when we're around each other. We're ourselves. No walls or guards. I'm not pretending to be someone around you like I feel like I have to be around other people. Its the fact that I can accept you for who you are and honestly I would hate it if you'd change." Jake told her.

Evelyn was bright red in the face now, and trying to fight off her blush. Oh hell, I need to get out of here. "I-I don't know - I guess you can see it however you like," she said, not liking the ring of truth in his words. She didn't even believe in love, God damn it. And she didn't want to start! It was just painful even liking him!

Evelyn clenched her hands together, not looking at him but at her whitening knuckles. "I...." She sighed, not knowing how to explain the heavy obstruction in her heart. "Your pizza's pro-probably....probably getting cold," she stammered feebly.

Jake looked down away from Evelyn, he felt really stupid right now.

He knew he shouldn't have said anything. Just pretended like he hadn't said that damn word to her.

"I uh...you know what? You're right I should eat." Jake said walking past Evelyn opening the door halfway.

She really hated it when this happened. She wasn't simply feeling guilty. Added was a painful ache that had nothing to do with her cowardly reaction and everything to do with what she felt for him.

It just felt wrong letting him assume she didn't care about what he'd said. She did. And THAT was the whole damn problem.

Evelyn sidestepped, slamming his door before he could leave and stepping between it and him. She looked up at him, flustered because she really was not planning this.

"What..." That didn't sound right so she started over. "Jake, you tell me all of this and yet you forget that we've pretty much ignored each other's existence for the past month! How do you expect me to react? Am I supposed to be happy and just forget that we didn't work out? Because..." She faltered, trailing off and looking away as she swallowed a lump in her throat, feeling her eyes sting. She hadn't cried in a while and she wasn't about to!

Jake watched her turn away, was she going to cry? This isn't what he wanted to happen!

He knew there was truth to her words, its why he hurt. Sure he wasn't expecting her to react all "let's be together forever." They had issues, plus not speaking for a month then announcing that you loved the person, who does this?!

Jake placed his hands on her arms and tilted his head to her level, losing his breath at her eyes filled with hurt, "Hey listen, don't okay? I'm sorry. This isn't what I wanted to happen, I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry, please don't." He said in a soothing voice. "This isn't your fault, I shouldn't have expected for you to feel the same way about me as I do. You're right this is insane."

Evelyn blinked the tears away furiously, tilting her chin up and only then realizing Jake's face was suddenly much closer. She narrowed her eyes. "And you're an idiot for not listening to me," she said quietly.

She reached up, acting instinctively to hug him, she wasn't sure why. She just felt horrible for making him feel horrible. But when she slipped her arms around his neck, somehow, her lips met his halfway there and she was suddenly kissing him instead.

Jake's eyes widened startled by her kiss, but he had followed her wrapping his arms around her waist returning her kiss. Jacob had rested his hand on the small of her back, his heart was racing. He was kissing Evelyn like he hadn't seen her in years, he pulled away not wanting to but he knew he had to breathe, he rested his forehead on her's, "I..." He was breathless and speechless at the same time.

"Pizza," Evelyn blurted abruptly, to remind him, pulling back and stepping away from him to clear her head. She ran a hand through her hair and tugged off her half-askew hair tie in frustration, angry with herself. What the hell was she doing?!

"Pizza?" Jake said inaudibly, wondering why on earth had she mentioned pizza? Then he remembered that the guys had ordered pizza. Jake wasn't hungry though. His eyes fell on Evelyn, how her hair cascaded down her shoulders messy and beautiful. Although she looked frustrated, she was still beautiful to him and he was trying so hard to control himself to keep from just kissing her, but he felt himself caving.

Jake couldn't do this to himself, he wanted her. He closed the space between them again and before she could protest he had his arm wrapped around her again pulling her into him kissing her passionately.

She was at first too caught off guard to do anything but let him kiss her. Evelyn felt her face warm automatically as she let herself cave. She lifted a hand to grip at his arm and tug it off her, tried to stay focused on what she should be doing as opposed to...

Her fingers tightened on his arm before she realized she was kissing him back. Was she insane? She jerked her face sharply to he side, feeling her head swoon dizzily and her heartbeats pick up almost painfully. "Don't," she began breathlessly, tugging at his arm around her waist so he'd let go. Evelyn bit her lip, looking away and feeling stupid for not being firm on this. She was pathetic, she admitted to herself.

Jake should have listened but instead he pulled her arm gently kissing her softly, he edged back sitting on his bed and pulling Evelyn down into his lap.

Ashton had finished his pizza, Seth had bounded back to his room to make a mysterious phone call, and there was still no Jake. Ashton fervently hoped Evelyn hadn't killed the guy and stuffed his corpse in his closet.

"We should leave some pizza for Jake," he said, setting aside a couple slices. "What the hell's holding him up? It's freaking pizza!"

***

She was an idiot. This thought kept going through Evelyn's head even as she straightened in his lap and kissed him back, disregarding where she was seated. Her runaway train of thought suddenly came back, the panic from earlier that this was headed nowhere, and she forced herself to pull back yet again, holding herself from falling backward off his lap by an arm around his neck. She needed to breathe.

Realizing just where she was sitting, her cheeks grew hot. "Jake, I...are you nuts?" she demanded feebly. Feeling flustered, she began edging backwards off his lap. She should have left ages ago!