Freshmen Dorms

Antonio grunted, "Um no problem Seth." He winced rubbing his shoulder, damn Seth.

Ashton got up, headphones around his neck, and peered into the hallway. "Oy! Keep it down!" He glanced worriedly at Jake's door.

Seth made flapping motions at Ashton. "You're a buzzkill!"

"And you're an airheaded dunce," Ashton stated. "Your best friend is having a breakdown and you're rambling about some chick you barely know."

Seth blinked confusedly, only then recalling his mission. "Oooh, crap!" He stalked down the hallway to Jake's room, pounding on the door. "CHRISTMAS IS HERE!"

"The fuck?" Ashton asked, secretly relieved Seth was acting like his usual loony self. He shook his head and withdrew.

Antonio shrugged at his brother and went back to the couch where he had his books sprawled out for studying.

Jacob heard Seth's booming voice and stared at his door reluctantly. Did he really feel like having Seth in here going on and on about his new found romance over the gold digger? If he didn't let him in though, Seth would just bulldoze his way in.

Jake opened his door, "I thought Christmas didn't come to the jerks."

Seth waved a dismissive hand in Jake's face and stormed in like a small tornado. He took over the desk chair, spinning it around and plonking down on it backwards. "So I hear. Does it come to the ill at heart?"

Jake closed his door and sat on the edge of bed, and shrugged, "I dunno, I don't think I've had a heart attack so I wouldn't know if it would or not."

Seth was never the type to beat about the bush so he simply said, "What about heart break? I mean, I hear it from the twins but I figure I should get your side." He paused. "God damn it, just get drunk and be merry! It's holiday season, Jake! Don't mope around over some girl!"

Jake rolled his eyes, it was only a matter of time since the newest Cupid came in here to hammer him about Evelyn, "Really, I'm aware its the holidays Seth. I'm not moping over Evelyn, you're all being really annoying and thinking I am when I'm not. Besides doesn't the newly crowned king of romance have some tights he needs to fit into for his figure skating debut, with his partner Thorn?" Jake asked coldly.

Seth frowned, choosing to ignore Jake's icy tone. "Well you're being really bitchy lately," he said bluntly. "I get that it's exam time but you've been all weird ever since the bonfire, when you had that food fight with Evelyn. So I can see why the twins might see it as her being the problem." He shrugged. "I'm just saying, bro. I mean, there is nothing wrong with missing someone." He cracked a grin. "If all the Patron in the world was gone, would you be this vague about missing it or would you go out there and be all revolutionary tequila-comeback leader?"

"Seth mixing tequila and Evelyn in the same sentence shouldn't even be allowed. I don't miss her, why the hell would I miss someone who made me miserable a majority of the time? You guys are stupid if you think I do." Jake retorted, taking out his phone to ignore an incoming call from work.

"But isn't that just how you worked?" Seth asked vaguely. He was not good at this love guru shit! Jake was just being a nuisance. Seth huffed angrily. "Just go fix it, damn it! I don't know, go tackle her and be all "I LOVE YOU LIKE I NEVER LOVED ALCOHOL!" and sing a dann sonnet and make out and be fucking happy!" he said hopefully.

Jacob couldn't even find a response that could dignify a somewhat decent answer to Seth's insanity. No way in hell would he sing a sonnet or whatever the hell to Evelyn! He didn't love her, and he didn't miss her! What was so hard to understand about this concept!?

"Dude, I don't wanna make out with her. Or recite Shakespeare! Why do you all think I'm in love with her?!" Jake huffed, rubbing his forehead with his hand.

Seth snorted. "Um, yeah, the number of compromising positions you've been caught in with her just kind of drills gaping holes in that not-making-out statement." He sat up, scrutinizing Jake for a moment. "How do you define love, Jake? I mean, you say you were in love with Rachel, right? How do you know?"

Jake fell back on his bed staring straight up at the ceiling, "Dude its not like we planned to be in those positions. They were always accidents gone wrong cause of her tripping me or us fighting like children." He needed to clear that up, never did Jake and Evelyn really plan to end up in a compromising position it just sort of happened.

But love? How did he describe love, he wasn't sure of it. He still wasn't sure. Jake knew he had loved Rachel before she became crazy and used him. He also knew he liked, well still liked. Evelyn but it wasn't as intense as love.

Jacob sat up and just shrugged at Seth, "I don't know. I mean it was so weird. Like you would do anything for them, you know just like how I would do anything for you guys. As gay as this sounds Rachel was the first person I would think about in the morning and the last person I thought about before I went to bed when I dated her." Just like how you think about Evelyn. He pushed on ignoring his thoughts, "The person you love just has the ability to make you feel so good about yourself, like you can do anything and that nothing can stand in your way. But..." Jake's eyes flicked to the window briefly he saw a few snow flakes flurrying outside his window and looked at Seth.

"They can say or do the shittiest things to you. They can bring you down and just rip you to shreds. You give a piece of yourself to someone and you want them to accept you for who you are and everything you have to offer and they sit there and spit on you and just they know." Jake paused, scratching at his arm absently. "They know so much about how you tick, they can say things that make you upset for weeks. And stuff that makes you contemplate a lot of stupid things you would have never thought. They can be the best thing about your day or the worst. They can manipulate you so easily, because once you let your walls down, that person gets control and its scary. Its scary knowing that someone else can control how you feel." Jake clenched and unclenched his hands, his dark eyes clouded for a moment but he shook his head.


He let out a breath, "As cliche as it sounds Andreasis, you just know. You just feel it that you wouldn't want to imagine life without that person. Just being with them is all you need and nothing else. Love consumes you entirely, you want nothing but to be in that persons arms and just staring into their eyes, you love all their little quirks and you just... love is accepting that's it. Its accepting the person for who they are and just loving them and working at it. It needs to go both ways, one person can't put all the work in it otherwise its just gonna break and... you know what? Forget I said any of this. You probably think I'm so stupid right now. I've wasted my breath enough. "

Jake stopped himself, he didn't like this not one bit. He didn't like that everything he was saying that everything in his mind just kept going back to Evelyn, he kept picturing her eyes, her smile. The way they lay together in her bed when he brought her cookies, how the lay together in the bathtub. His jaw twitched and he scratched his eyebrow. He didn't want to think about her. There was no way he could love her, they hardly knew each other at all.

"But then how do you differ between infatuation and love?" Seth asked logically. "I mean,, infatuation is also where you ignore all the bad parts of a person and only see their good sides and where they're always on your mind. How do you know what you felt wasn't just heavy infatuation, which disguised itself as love?"

"Because when you love someone you accept the shitty parts about them too. I mean for the time being Rachel's bad habits were the fact that she always did this obnoxious tongue clicking thing when we watched movies, or she would was always not matter how ahead of time we planned stuff. She was always late. Its just little things or things they do that would drive any other person nuts that you just love it, you love everything. I mean she used to snort when she laughed and Lola would make fun of Rachel and I told her it was cute. When in reality she sounded like a pig. That's it you just accept everything because you love them." Jake said, he really had no other way in putting it. It was hard to explain to someone who had never experienced it.

"So then...once you fall out of love, that stuff magically becomes annoying again?" Seth asked, raising an eyebrow. From what he could tell, this just sounded like infatuation. The glossing over or "accepting" of bad traits. "So you are basically just glossing over bad traits. They aren't bad, they're cute. Like you're too infatuated to see the real thing."

"No because when you fall out of love, the things you did actually love about them. You hate it too. You hate it because its those things that stick to you the most, and its just... I don't know Seth its so hard to explain." Jake sighed.

Seth frowned. "I still don't see the difference. I always kind of thought love was this sappy magical thing that you don't get rid of, no matter what, and that infatuated like was the thing that you can escape. But whatever," he stretched. "You need to fix your mess...or," Seth tilted his head, eyes gleaming wickedly, "I'll fix it for you. You do recall the last time I did that. Well, Ashlee was involved too."

***

Evelyn was sitting on a bench by the subway now, trying to catch her breath again. She could sense Rose's hesitancy practically through the message. And Rose had a right to feel that way.

Evelyn bit her lip harder and pulled out a sheaf of vitamin pills, popping one into her mouth while Nova dug a trench nearby in the flowerbed under a tree.

So Seth wouldn't really learn at all from this experience. But maybe he'd realize girls were just as wily and capable of duping as he thought he was.

Jake's eyes widened at that statement as he swallowed back the dry lump in his throat, "No! NO Seth! No more schemes! No more locking in the bathroom or anything! Please!" He pleaded.

Seth crossed his arms like a sulky kid. "Why? I'm supposed to sit here watching you pine away over her? If you don't fix it, I'll do it!"

"Seth I.. I'm not pining, just please. No. Seth it won't work, she doesn't trust me its over and I... I..." He was tripping over his words he hated this, he knew that Seth could see through him and this wasn't supposed to be happening.

"Since when do you take a no?" Seth said, somewhat worried. "C'mon, think of this as yet another Jake-Evelyn battle. She steamrolls over you, you're gonna lie down?" He jumped to his feet. "Clearly, you are love-scorned but fear not! I am your greatest ally!" he declared, walking over and slinging an arm around Jake where he sat. "I shall win thee thine love of thine miserable life!"

Jake looked at Seth and blinked a few times, "Dude you need to lay off the Romeo and Juliet. Seriously Seth, I'm not in love. I'm just you're right I miss her okay? Its not gonna work out, listen I appreciate the effort and that you're willing to help but seriously be realistic about this. Plus I don't love her okay? I just like her... a lot. So I just need to get over it, get drunk. Whatever."

"And go into depression, hang yourself, yeah I get all that," Seth said snottily, patting Jake's head like he was a dumb kid.

Seth punched his shoulder. Hard. His brows furrowed. "Seriously, get over your woe stage. You," he moved to stand in front of Jake and bent down, gripping his shoulders painfully tight and shaking him with each word. "You. Are. A. Man. Not. A. Wuss. Pants." He paused. "Damn that rhymed."

***

Evelyn entered the lobby, taking the elevator up - and it took five years as usual. She leaned against the wall and tried not to pass out in a bout of exhaustion. Finally it dinged to the lobby and the doors opened and people spilled out.

Evelyn entered with Nova squirming angrily in her bag. She frowned at Rose's text. Pick favorites? What, had Nova sensed he was not about to see Jake any time soon? Evelyn absently hit the 5 button.

"I'm not in woe! I'm in annoyance." Jake winced and gripped Seth's arms and shoved him, "Let me go."