Freshmen Dorms

Jake went on over to the window, and he said, "I DON'T want no cheesee!" He let himself get pelted with rain drops and it actually felt quite refreshing on his warm skin.

He looked down and saw a girl in a tight dress running out of the dorms and he wolf whistled loudly, "Girl in the cheetah dress, you have an amazing rack!"

"Fuck you jerk!" She called up at him.

"You wish, Cheetahlicious!" He shouted back down, sticking his head out the window, letting his head get soaked in the torrential downpour.

Alexis made a squeaking noise against his lips, shoving against his chest a little but gave in, her brain frazzled.

Connor went into Evelyn's bedroom and toddled over to her dresser, yanking open some of the dressers. He threw clothes out, humming to Hot N Cold. "youuuu.. pms... like a bitch.. I would know!!!.."He paused. "heeey.. sxze legs got some stuffies.." He pulled out a pretty lil' bra and took off his shirt before strapping it on and then pulled out underwear and struggled as he shoved them on over his jeans.

" I.. am.. SUPER CONNOR!" He yelled as he ran(stumbled) back out of the room, hands in the air like a superhero.

Evelyn glared at Jake's head, her drunken state making her angrier than she would normally be. She jerked him back in by the scruff of his collar because she was at the damn window first! "She looks like she needs your help. Why don't you go out there and risk getting hit by lightning and help her out since she's so pretty?" she snapped irritably at him. She shoved him away and leaned out, letting rain pelt her face and drench her hair. "She needs an UMBRELLA!"

The girl ran out of sight.

Evelyn heard thudding footsteps behind her. Probably Connor. Evelyn ignored this, closing her eyes and began to sway with the beat inside her hazy mind, singing quietly so the rain drowned out her soft voice. "You have my heart, and we'll never be worlds apaaa-art. Maybe in magazines, but you'll still be my staaa-ar..." Her happy mood dimmed a bit. She wasn't entirely sure why.

Seth ignored Connor's voice, too busy trying to sit up straight and hold Alexis upright while they made out.

"Ella, ella... ay ay... under my umbrellllaaa!!" Jake slurred, he trotted back on over towards the living room and looked at Connor decked out in superhero lingerie ensemble.

He took out his phone and snapped a quick picture, saving it he tucked his phone back into his pocket and he shook Connor, "Quick Super Connor! There is a Cheetahlicious girl out there with breasts the size of watermelons who needs your saving!!"

Alexis ignored the chaos in the background, to drunk to give a shit and hey- in her head this was Chace Crawford, not Seth.

***

Connor ignored Jake completely and put his hands behind head, beginning to sway his hips. "YEWWW KNOW MAH HIP DUN LIE AND I'M STARTIN' TO FEL YOU.. GURL! ASI ES P..SOMETHIN'!" He yelled in a sing-songy voice and danced around. "I am soooo sxxzzeee, you want maaah booodddy..." He began the pelvic thrusts.

Seth decided he really needed to breathe and pulled back, blinking dazedly at Alexis. "Nicole Kidman?" he slurred. "Hey! You're not her!"

Evelyn pulled herself back, the top half of her body thoroughly drenched. She peeled her hair off her wet face, feeling a bit awake now that the cold rain had jarred the drunken haze. But she still felt lost, like she'd accidentally wandered onto an episode of The Twilight Zone.

Her green eyes landed on...."Is that mine?" she yelped, staring at Connor. And then giggled hysterically. "You work it but you don't have the body for it."

Jake whistled loudly, encouraging Connor's ridiculous dance movements, "Owwww oww! Shake whatcha yo mama gave ya Simmons! Shake it don't break it!"

"Shakiraaa! Shakira!!" He rolled his tongue, and swiveled his hips slightly and made his way back out the window, and kind of draped himself out to cool himself off.

Alexis made a face and tried to shove him off. "You ain't no Chace Crawford either!" She hiccuped and then groaned and laid across his lap. "Asshole..."

***

Connor began to shake his butt towards Evelyn. "Aye aye ayeeee!"

Seth tilted himself so he could watch Connor's display of man-at-wits-end. "BREAK it, mah homie!" he encouraged him.

Evelyn smirked up at the lingerie-clad brunet. "You don't know how to dance!" She bounded over to where she kept her stereo on the corner of the table and hit Play, flipping through the CD that was currently in it till she reached the song Connor was dancing to. "Let me show you, ugly!" Evelyn skipped back over and lifted her hands up, swaying her body in time with the music. She threw her head back, felt like she was about to puke and laughed hysterically. "Come on, Lex!" She spotted her roomie in Seth's lap. "Come move with me!"

Alexis looked up at Evelyn and blinked before grinning and stumbled up before going over to Evelyn and threw her arms up and swayed her body with the beat.

Seth stumbled up, feeling his legs shake after sitting, crouching and kneeling for so long, walked over to Connor and informed him his hair made him look like "a donkey faggot after menopause".

Evelyn paused dancing. "And pink underwear goes so well with it!" she said gleefully, skipping over and giving the "faggot" a hug.

Connor hiccuped and patted her head before tottering back and fell into the table, taking the red-head with him.

"WHOA! Take it to a room!" Alexis shouted and laughed, watching before going over and picked up her camera from it's place on the counter and started to snap very sloppy pictures.

"TIMBEERRR!!" Jake yelled watching Evelyn and Connor fall over.

He did a little dance over to them where Alexis was also snapping photos, and he stepped behind the Evelyn-Connor sandwich throwing up peace signs and sticking out his tongue.

"Faceboookkk bittchhhess!!"

Connor had hit the table and gotten intimate with the floor. Evelyn had hit his chin and simply collapsed on top of him. She groaned and rubbed her reddened forehead, sitting up on the Connor-mattress. What the hell was Jake doing over there?

She reached up and grabbed the hem of his shirt. "Help me up, Nacho Libre!"

Seth glanced over at them and then at the iPhone he'd picked up near the dining table. It had a blue-and-black cover on it. He grinned and dialed the first number that came to his mind. James should party with them! That kid was cool.

Alexis took a picture of Evelyn and Connor, the angle NOT an appropriate one sadly. She hiccuped and went over to Seth, losing all morals at the moment and pulled him over, landing a big kiss to his lips and managed to take a sloppy picture of the.. sloppy kiss.

***

"Owie.." Connor whimpered and shoved Evelyn off before he got up and tugged off his jeans and his shoes, left in his boxers, Evelyn's bra and his socks.

Jake snorted nudging Evelyn lightly, "Shoo girl, help yo self up!" He said plopping down on the couch.

***

James heard his phone ring, looking down he saw Evelyn's name on the screen.

He didn't want to answer but he still felt terrible for how everything went down.

He figured he could just apologize for that, and never talk to her after this and then delete her number.

"Hey..." James answered.

Evelyn tumbled off Connor, landing on her elbow on the wooden floor hard. "Oww!" she yelped. She swung her fist out and punched his chest as he got up.

Evelyn sat up and flipped Jake off, getting to her feet dazedly. "Didn't your mother ever teach you any manners?"

Seth heard some random voice on the phone in his hand. He had his other arm wrapped around Alexis. He wasn't entirely sure what the hell she was doing but he went with forcing his tongue into her mouth, phone ignored.

Alexis continued her drunken lustful make-out with Seth, before pulling away while biting onto his bottom lip to tug it, taking a picture more accidently as she did, dropping the camera and then pulled away, starting to laugh for some unknown reason.

***

"BEWBS! BEWBS EVERWHAR!" Connor shouted, now half way out the window, flailing his arms.

James pulled the phone away from his ear hearing all the commotion on the other line. He then heard two people moaning, and his eyes widened.

Had Evelyn called him while she was about to get it on? She did have a touch screen phone so that would explain.

But still, he did not want to hear her booty call.

"Umm....call me later?" He said weirded out and hanging up his phone.

***

Jake had landed on the passed out Tony, who didn't event seem to stir once he fell on him.

Jake slapped his face a bit, proving that Tony was out cold, Jake clumisly rolled off the couch.

He found a marker on the floor which probably had rolled off the table when Connor landed on it.

He took the marker and drew a crude looking penis near Tony's mouth, and wrote "penus" on his forehead.

He then crawled over to Ashton? And drew a mustache on his face and colored him in a unibrow, and he also gave him a fancy looking monocole.

Jake crawled back over to Tony, taking his phone back out he took a picture next to him. Jake smiling and holding a thumbs up.

He got up again and made his way to Alexis and Seth making out, he snapped a picture of them too and put his phone back.

"Ow ow, Sexy Lexieee!!" He howled.

Seth pulled away from Alexis, winked at Jake and glanced down at the phone in his hand. Why was he holding it? He blinked and then remembered he had to call someone. He dialed James again.

Evelyn, starting to feel her fever kick back now that the alcohol was dimmed, had been watching Jake's handiwork with as much interest as he'd watched hers. She briefly considered shoving Connor out the window and snapping a picture of it too.

Wait. Where was her phone? Evelyn felt around in the pockets of her denim romper and then her white jacket. Shit!

She glanced around, figuring she'd find it later, but then made her way wearily over to where Jake had just tucked his phone in his back pocket. "Can you help me find my phone? I want to take a picture of Connor splatting on the concrete."

Alexis hiccuped and lazily leaned against Seth, slipping a hand in his back pocket, hiccuping again.

***

Connor spotted some guy with glasses rushing to get into the dorms. "HEY! HEY, YOU LOOKIN' WHITE AND NERRRDDDAAH!" He shouted, briefly remembering the Weird Al. song as he waved his hands and flipped the guy back when he flipped Connor off before going into the building.

"...GUYS! GAAAUUYYYST, THERE'S THUNDER, HELP ME IIIIN!" He whined loudly.

Before Jake could say anything to Evelyn he darted across the room tripping over his own feet.

"I'll save ya buddy!!" Jake exclaimed, going to the window and attempting to pull Connor in.

***

James saw Evelyn was calling him again and he was wondering why?

He really didn't want to hear her getting it in!

He answered though even though he didn't want to again, "What the hell?"

Seth felt himself sag. He was already so full of tequila, vodka and a shitload of other stuff that he could barely stand, let alone hold up a drunk girl. He staggered back and hit the wall, leaning against it as he let go of Alexis. "JAMES!" he hollered. "COME AT ME, BRO!"

Evelyn glanced away from Jake and Connor's failed rescue attempt when she heard that word. Her eyes widened. Seth grinned drunkenly at her.

"Is that my-my phone?" she yelped. He shrugged. Evelyn blinked, figured it didn't matter now and then headed purposefully toward Jake, stopping just behind him. She leaned over, a little off-balance, and slipped her fingers clumsily into his back pocket where his phone made a slight bump.

Connor flailed more. "Helphelphelp."He whined, before jumping from lightning. "GETMEINGETMEINGETMEINGETMEIN!"

***

Alexis hiccuped and slumped down to sit on the floor, looking around. "Hmhm.."She mumbled and laid on the ground instead, legs and arms spread out.

Seth?!

"Seth?!" James asked in disbelief holding his phone far away from himself as Seth shouted at him.

"Why the hell are you shouting? Better yet why are you calling me off Ev's phone!?" James was starting to wonder just what the hell they were doing there.

He shook his head, "Actually I don't wanna know.."

***

Jake tried to help Connor in through the window, but he felt someones hand on his butt and he yelped turning around to see Evelyn, with her hand down his pocket.

He grabbed her pocketed wrist and smirked, "Well Red I never knew you had quite the frisky side."